Well, I am really tired. I got like four hours of sleep last night, but it was totally worth it because I got to spend time with Dustin, and that always makes me happy. :) Anyway, I just got back from Phi Sig Pi's end of the year dinner at Maggiano's. It was so much fun! It made me really excited for next year, when I know I'm going to make more brothers, and get closer to the ones I have now. I'm going to miss everyone in the summer.

I had a pretty awful morning that actually turned out for the better. I woke up and took a shower at 8 a.m. and while I was in the shower, I picked up my glasses to clean them and they broke. Luckily, it was just the screw on the side, but I freaked out because I had work at nine. However, I calmed myself down, walked to Rite Aid blind as a bat without my glasses, and picked up an eyeglass repair kit. I fixed them, and I am proud that I solved my own problem without having a nervous breakdown. The moral of the story is that I should always live near a Rite Aid.

Its odd being at the point where I am in my life. I lived here in the dorm all year, and now I have to move back home and live there for 7 days a week rather than the two on weekends. I just got off the phone with my mom, and its like my house is not my home anymore. My sister took over my bedroom, so now I just have a bed and a dresser in there and that is it. My mom informed me that I have to put all my stuff from my dorm room in the garage because there is no room for it at home. At this point, I think I should have sublet an apartment for the summer, and moved my stuff there until I can move into my apartment for next year. Is this part of growing up? And if it is, when will I finally have a home that I can call my own, and where I don't have to leave my things in the garage?

Another thing that's pretty tough right now is leaving the family I found on the 8th floor of Johnson. We had so much fun this year, and we got to be so close, that its so hard to leave everyone. No more barging into rooms at 3 in the morning for emergency study help. No more fashion advice from Tim and Ryan. No more eating Chinese food in the hallway. Most importantly, no more private talks and laughs and tears shared in our bedrooms. Last night, was the greatest. We had our last floor meeting, and tye dyed t-shirts, and as a final good-bye our dorm decided to have a fire alarm. So we sat on the grass and played duck duck goose, and Jesse wrestled Liz, and Liz fought him back, and we just laughed and laughed. Then the girls came back and we watched "Love Actually" together until 1 in the morning. That's another thing...no more movies or Gilmore Girls or Must-See TV. I should stop before I cry.

I love you guys, but next year we will keep in touch, and we will rock out even more.

I have a final in a couple minutes. Its five short answer essays and the professor said bullshitting is encouraged. I love this guy. Anyway, school sucks, I want to be done for the summer, and I think that I hate Alexander Mogilney. I also hope the Flyers win tomorrow night. If they don't I'll be mad.

I found your webjournal, and saw that you put it back online. I read past entries that I remember reading at a time when I was so infatuated with you. Now, reading them with all thoughts of infatuation gone from my head, I realized that the entries when you talked about me were written in a tone as if I was just a buddy or pal. Always "hanging out," and never dating. That's all I was to you wasn't it? A pal, someone you could call on for a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, or just for some ass. I remember distinctly that whenever I had a problem, you would brush it away like it was nothing, just a menial little 18 year old melodrama to you. Even though those were the things that really hurt me. I always listened to you, but you never really heard what I said.

Tarah told me that hindsight is 20/20, which I believe now. People do change, and I feel that I have changed for the better. Please, don't feel that you are completely gone from my head or heart, as I learned a lot from you, and I will always remember you and what we had. But things are different now. I have changed a lot in the past year, a lot that you haven't been there for, and I think little Beth is all grown up now. I have a boyfriend who actually loves me, not someone who puts on the facade of love. I have friends at this school that you made me want to hate so much, but ended up at the very end of this year actually loving. Still, I wonder, I've found my place, but have you found yours?

I leave you all with a quote from Tarah that totally made my day, "Here's to men whose heads on their shoulders are bigger than the one in their pants...may they suffer from severe genital pain the rest of thier lives...cheers!"

I love the smell of fresh coffee in the morning. However, I got coffee grounds in my water reservoir and now I have to fish them out so they don't clog my coffeemaker. I love my coffeemaker. It has kept me caffeinated all of this year, and for that, I am very grateful.

Dustin is no longer a Princess Bride virgin. I am so proud! LOL :) He watched the movie for the first time with me last night. I don't think I bugged him too much with reciting all of the words of the movie. I probably did, but he would never tell me.

Its sunny today, and the trees have leaves on them again. I have a ten page paper to write. Something doesn't add up.

I went to Tau this weekend, which is the Phi Sigma Pi chapter at East Carolina State University. Let me tell you, from what I remember of the weekend, it was great! I drank, I drank, and I drank some more. A fun time was had by all.

Now, I have to come back to the real world, and work on finals. I have two big papers and a final on Thursday, all of which I have not started. Oh well, life goes on. I'm glad to be back :)

"The difference between a brother and a friend is that a brother greets you with a smile and a hug."