One way ticket to Phoenix: $333
Headphones to rent on the plane: $5
The fact that no one would know where I am, or be able to contact me after I leave Phoenix: priceless

I'm already gone. The ticket is one way....you do the math.

As I walked to class today, I noticed the wet leaves on the ground. Their shapes and colors brought me back in time to when I was in grade school, and my best friend and I made huge piles of leaves in her backyard. We jumped into them off her hill, buried ourselves within their stems, and lived in our own little world. The nostalgia came rushing over me as this memory passed through my mind. Flash forward ten years later to last fall when I was baby-sitting. The boys were in their yard making leaf piles and jumping in them. I came outside to see what all the noise was, and I told them to stop because I was afraid they were going to hurt themselves, get bitten by a bug, and/or trigger their allergies. I stopped in the middle of correcting them, and thought to myself, "My God, when did I turn into my mother? When did I start worrying about all these trivial things, and stop allowing myself and other people to have fun?" I told myself that I wouldn't do that anymore. So, I told the boys, "Never mind what I just said," helped them make a pile of leaves and jumped in one myself.

I don't know what the point of this story is. I think its just to tell you all to make a pile of leaves today, and jump in them.

I love how whenever I sign onto blogger, it always says, "Welcome back, Beth." It knows my name, and always makes me feel so welcome. I am at work study now, and I just saw one of my heroes, Darlene Brooks walk into the room next door. She said hi to me. I feel great right now. Well, at least in mind.

In body, I feel like crap. Bethany went home last night with a "sinus infection bordering bronchitis." Not fun, but now I am sick and all stuffed up. My chest hurts and I think it is from built up fluid. I didn't go to Spanish this morning, and I'm not going to Psych or flute lessons today. I need to sleep after being up until 1:30 last night trying to sign on to OWLnet for registering my classes. Luckily, I got on, and registered for all the classes I wanted. Even the much coveted "Beat Poets" class that only had three seats left. So, Allen Ginsberg, we meet again. I am actually excited about my classes next semester. I only took four and all of them sound interesting. Well, that's what I said about this semester too...so we'll see.

Mike is so adorable. Yesterday, he gave me a book called Wemberly Worried by Kevin Henkes. If you ever get a chance to read this book, do it. It describes me perfectly, and if you know me...you should read it.

I hate John Street, and now he is our mayor again. This city blows. I have so much to do today, and today is supposed to be my day of rest. Its like Beth's Sabbath. But no, I had to overschedule myself as usual. When will I learn?

My roomates and I have a nice hornet friend that lives inside our window. Kail and I found him, and we've decided to name him Horny. He is one stubborn son of a bitch, let me tell you. We have to keep our window closed until he dies so he won't get out and into our room. Thank goodness its not as hot as yesterday. I had my Spanish Oral Assessment today. Don't ask me how it went, I'm still trying to figure that one out myself.

Ugh...I'm so bored.

"Though we share this humble path, alone
How fragile is the heart
Oh give these clay feet wings to fly
To touch the face of the stars


Breathe life into this feeble heart
Lift this mortal veil of fear
Take these crumbled hopes, etched with tears
We'll rise above these earthly cares"

-Loreena McKennit, "Dante's Prayer"

I don't know what I want to do anymore. I'm just tired of being here, and tired of not knowing.